First Line of Defense

Occasionally, I find myself completely clueless.
I don't know how I am feeling, I don't know how to handle certain situations, I don't know what words to say, I don't know what's right or wrong. I wonder if there is something that I could have done differently, or if I could have handled certain situations in a more suitable way? Sometimes I'm clueless in how to make a relationship with someone, how to get through this last semester of my online classes, and how I am going to find the time to fold the heap of laundry that always makes itself present.
Occasionally I find myself at a complete loss.

So, who do I go to when I find myself in these situations? I usually go to first my husband, or my cute mom or dad. They always have great advice for me. I am so lucky to be able to be surrounded by so many wise people who can help me make positive decisions, and guide me towards a happy, and righteous living.

As I finished my morning prayers today, I rolled back into bed, and pulled out my scriptures where I opened to 2 Nephi 32:

8 And now, my beloved brethren, I perceive that ye ponder still in your hearts; and it grieveth me that I must speak concerning this thing. For if ye would hearken unto the Spirit which teacheth a man to pray, ye would know that ye must pray; for the evil spirit teacheth not a man to pray, but teacheth him that he must not pray.

9 But behold, I say unto you that ye must pray always, and not faint; that ye must not perform any thing unto the Lord save in the first place ye shall pray unto the Father in the name of Christ, that he will consecrate thy performance unto thee, that thy performance may be for the welfare of thy soul.

It hit me like a stone wall.
Heavenly Father should be our very first line of defense. 

I usually pray to my Heavenly Father when I need him, but it usually seems like I use him as my last resort. Unfortunately, it also seems that I only pray to my Heavenly Father when I feel I need him.
Elder Bednar says:  "Prayer becomes more meaningful as we counsel with the Lord in all of our doings, as we express heartfelt gratitude, and as we pray for others."

The more we pray, the more opportunities we have to better know and understand our Savior. With that knowledge comes faith.
When we have faith in Him, we will know that he grants knowledge to all those who ask, we come to know of our individual worth and the love that God has for us, and we come to know the truthfulness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ. We come to trust our Savior's time table, and get to build a relationship with Him.

So, if you are facing a challenge in life, or finding yourself at a loss, instead of putting Siri, your spouse, your friend, or you parents your first line of defense, put the Savior there instead.
     Sincerely,

Pine Trees, Good people, Delicious Icecream, and Big Fish

Kent and I took a little vacation up to the panhandle of Idaho. He served an LDS mission in the Spokane, Washington area, and I got to go and meet all of the incredible people that live up there.

We left for Coeur d'Alene Wednesday night at 8:00 p.m.. and arrived at 6:00 a.m. just in time to catch a few hours of sleep before the excitement of our vacation began.

Oh my lanta... Coeur d'Alene is the most beautiful place that I have ever been (it was even prettier than Kauai if you ask me). The pine trees were the greenest of greens. They were tall, strong, and so thick that light could not get through them. The lakes were calm, serene, and clear. The ice cream was FANTASTIC! The fish were large and energetic, and soooo much fun to catch. All of that was great, but by far the best part was the company. Kent lived with the Lee family for about 3 months of his mission. He and their youngest song Scott became pretty close friends. I had heard such great things about Scott and was so excited to meet him and his darling girlfriend Heather. Scott is an avid outdoors-man. He does everything from rifle/bow hunting every animal there is, to fishing. Not only does he do it, but he knows exactly how to do it successfully. He and Heather took us to their favorite turkey hunting, and fishing spots. I was so grateful for the time that I had to be able to spend with Heather and Scott, and for the things that they taught me. Scott is 23 years old, and is a two time cancer survivor. He is an incredible man. In the short 2 days we were with them, Scott taught me a lot of things, but, most importantly he taught me that life is precious, and to cherish and love every second of it. Heather taught me that love out weighs everything. Her love for Scott, and his love for her was so strong, and it truly outweighed all things. I am so grateful for the members in Coeur d'Alene, and for the kindness and hospitality that they showed Kent while he was serving the Lord.

We departed from Coeur d'Alene Saturday afternoon, and headed to Spokane Washington where we visited the Stroh family. They were the SWEETEST people. They welcomed us into their home with a delicious home-cooked steak and potato meal, and finished it off with homemade huckleberry pie. I LOVE the Stroh's, and I know just from being with them for one night that they loved Kent so very much. While Kent was living there, their youngest song Trevor was still at home, and just like Scott, Trevor and Kent became very close. Kent says that Trevor is the only reason that he stayed sane while he was in Spokane haha. The Stroh's are some of the most down to earth, and most generous people I have ever met. We were planning on staying just for dinner and heading to Montana that night, but the weather got pretty bad, and the highway to Montana is kind of sketchy, so the Stroh's were kind enough to welcome us into the home for the night.

Sunday morning at the butt crack of dawn, we were up and ready to drive the two and a half hour drive to Libby, Montana. We were only about 15 minutes south of the Canadian border, and the whole drive there was absolutely beautiful. We followed the Kootenai River all the way there. Once we arrived in Libby, we met the Ercenbreck's for the last hour of their church, and then drove to their home. They are the kindest people ever. They were sooo fun to talk to and I loved hearing the stories they told about Kent while he was serving there. I was so sad that we couldn't stay and visit with them longer, but they left us with a picnic on the road, and a bag full of fresh huckleberries.

We left Libby, Montana at 3:00 in the afternoon. Siri told me that the drive back to American Fork was twelve and a half hours, but we made it in ten;) Even still, it was the longest drive EVER. We made the plan that Kent would drive the first half, and I would sleep so that I could drive the second half while he slept. He needed to be up for work at 6:00 the next morning. Well...... I suck at life. I couldn't fall asleep during the first half so when my half of the shift started at 10:00 p.m. I was VERYYYYY tired. I tried my hardest to stay awake, but my eyes just wouldn't focus on the roads. Kent finally told me to pull over so that he could drive because I was scaring him to death haha. I felt very very bad. Poor soul had to go to work with only an hour and a half of sleep the night before.

This vacation was so incredibly fun. I loved every piece of it. I love going to new places, and meeting new people. It's incredible to me that no matter where you are in the world, the Gospel, and the Spirit are the same. Now I know that the Northwest is not that far away from me, but still. I am so grateful for the incredible people that I was able to meet up there, and for their kindness that they have shown Kent and I. I am so grateful for the Kent's faithfulness and for his willingness to serve a two year mission. This vacation made me so excited for my brother, and for my future children to serve the Lord and his people.

     Sincerely,

My Very Rational, Irrational Fears

#1 - I am absolutely petrified of the dark. My husband makes fun of me allll the time about this. He says that there is nothing different about the dark than in the light, but he is SO wrong. The problem with the dark is that you don't know what's in the room!! Sure it's possible that the room looks the same in the light as the dark, but in the dark there could be someone hiding in a corner that you don't know about, or a boogie man hanging out in your closet, an you would have no idea until you were captured and dead.

#2 - Bees are Satan's coworkers. In my almost 21 years of existence I have never been stung by any kind of bee, and absolutely DREAD the day that it is going to happen. What if I am allergic and don't have an epee-pen and have to be rushed to the ER all because one nasty little bee stung me. I broke a window at work the other day because of a bee. I had been avoiding the ever-present killer-bee, that had somehow found its way into our little building. Being the only employee in the building at the time with a customer who was also scared of the little demon, I had to put on my big girl pants and do something about the creature. I was terrified that either A: I would miss the bee and piss it off, or B: I would just kind of hit it, stunning it for a second, and have an angry bee that wanted vengeance. I knew I had to kill it the first time or I risked the chance of getting stung. I rolled up a magazine and with all my might *SWACK!!!* The window shattered, and the bee was dead. Stupid bee.

#3 - I am also afraid of any kind of bug. Lady bugs, grasshoppers, butterflies, it doesn't matter. If it has more than 4 legs or is wormy I hate it and wish that it didn't exist.

#4 - NEEDLES..... When I was about 12 years old, I started getting pretty advanced in my piano studies. Along with more difficult songs came wrist and hand pain... It's a pretty sad tale because eventually I had to quit piano because my hands hurt so bad, but that's another story. In the process of trying to figure out what was wrong with my hands, I was sent to a neurologist to have a nerve study. For those of you who know what a nerve study is, I am very sorry. For those of you who don't, it's an exam where they stick electric needles in the effected area to test your nerve function. In other words, they torture you. I vividly remember laying on that exam bed being stuck over and over again, inbetween my fingers, in every joint in my hand, in my funny bone nerve, in my wrists, EVERYWHERE that bends or moves from tip of my fingers up to my elbows, and thus began my very very rational fear of needles. I get tense even thinking about flu shots.

     Sincerely,

BYU Women's Conference 2015

My site is under construction, so pardon the constant changes and messiness:)

I had the incredible opportunity to speak at BYU Women's Conference this year. I was given the topic of "communicating with young adults." At first I thought the topic was going to be sooooo hard, but by the time I started actually writing my talk, I had so much information flowing out of my head that I couldn't fit it all in my time limit. I absolutely loved dedicating all of my spare thoughts to this talk for 4 months. It was exhausting, terrifying, and at times mind-numbing, but absolutely wonderful. Would I ever want to do it again? NO WAY, but I am so glad that this opportunity was made available for me.

First of all, I thought before this, that I was brave. Well, I'm not. I have never really felt like I get nervous in front of big groups. I went to hear my dear friend Lesa Ward share her incredible message in a room of almost 2,000 people. It was then that I realized there would be a little less than double that in the room I was presenting in (A.K.A the Smithfield House 3,700 seats). Recognizing how many people would be in my session felt like I was on The Screamer at Lagoon, spinning around and around and around and around and around, wondering if I was going to be able to hold my delicious carrot Jamba Juice down. Let me tell ya folks, I get nervous in front of big groups.

I have given sacrament talks before, and that kind of thing, but it was such a different experience speaking in Woman's Conference. I knew that just about every person in that room wanted to hear what I had to say, and were either struggling with a young adult, and/or hoping to learn more about the way that we young adults communicate. It was a lot of pressure, and so humbling to feel Heavenly Father guide my words in a way that I hope touched the hearts of the woman that were listening to me. 


I focused on three different points in my talk. Here is a very short, and brief outline:

The first is to Let Your Children Fly- In other words, don't be a mama bear. Let us learn from our mistakes, Let us grow and repent on our own. Let us turn our own weaknesses into strengths, and let us come to you when we need help. As parents of young adults, it is not so much your job to prevent, solve, or control our problems, but to help, lead, and guide us as we work out our problems.

The second, is my validation, invasion, manipulation, and communication guideline -
Validation; We NEED to be validated. It is vital for us to feel validated in our feelings, our concerns, our disappointments, our achievements, our dreams, our circumstances, and our efforts. Validation let's us know that you are genuinely interest and that you care about us in a non-invasive way.
Invasion; Having an added respect for privacy is an important part to having a functioning relationship with our parents. Invading our time, or space is a one way ticket to a ruined relationship. At that same time, I think clear privacy boundaries need to be set with you as parents as well.
Manipulation; None of us likes to be manipulated. All manipulation does is cause resentful feelings towards the person doing the manipulating. My parents have applied the saying "always and invitation, never and expectation" to our family, and it has helped my husband and my relationship with them flourish.
Communication; It is so important to have one on one, in person chats with us. Reach out to your young adult, and let them take their time to reach back to you. They may not come running in excitement at first, but eventually they will truly cherish the time they get to spend with you. It is also just as important to make meaningful memories with children.

Lastly, love your children with all your heart, and trust the Lord - One of the many blessings of being a covenant keeping member of the church, as stated by Sister Parkins, is that those we love will be spiritually safe, and spiritually prepared. I have personal experience of the truthfulness of this blessing! I have stepped far off the straight and narrow before and I know that because of the covenants that my parents had made in the Holy House of the Lord, I was kept safe.

When things get tough, which they will, give your child the love that they need, support them through thick and thin, always use kind words, pray for your relationship with them daily, and unconditionally trust that Heavenly Father has a plan for each and every one of us.


I loved this experience with all my heart, and am so grateful for the testimony that has come from it. Huge thanks to all those who support me through thick and thin:)

     Sincerely,